Sunday, May 25, 2008
This made me cry, and gave me hope
Look at this girl. Look at how she doesn't question her right to do what the boys do, as well or better than they do. Look how proud both her parents are of her, and how adamantly they both stand up for her. Look at how she admires and respects her female heros (sorry, heroine just doesn't work for me somehow, it's too much like "heroette"), and honors them even as she hopes to surpass them.
Yes, there's opposition to her playing, and that's a bit disheartening. On the other hand, it's so plain in this instance that not allowing girls to play with boys is about the protection of the boys' fragile egos, rather than the girls' safety, that I think it will make even people with no feminist agenda think about how unfair that is, and maybe even about how crazy the whole gender set-up is.
Because look at the boy at 1:31 into the tape. He's not threatened by her, he's proud of her, of her "greatness", which he says makes him a better player. He doesn't need her to limit herself to protect some sense of gender superiority he's supposedly got to have in order to feel good about himself. He clearly feels fine about himself, and about his awesome female teammate, even if she can run rings around him.
This is progress. It's not enough, of course, and it won't be enough for some time yet, but I have to believe we are getting somewhere, and that it's important to see and to celebrate that. Girls like this, and boys like this, with support like this, will change the world. I believe that.
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2 comments:
Don't get me wrong, I agree completely. But to take the stance of Devil's advocate, if only for a moment, realize that the boy that was so happy about her was a boy on her team. Sure, he might have some reason to be sore at her, with her taking the spotlight. He obviously doesn't, but how much of that is due to the fact that his team is winning like hotcakes? I wonder how sore the boys are on the opposing teams? I wonder what they'd say? Is this completely the parents or not? I can understand the motive of a boy who has never played competition sports with a girl before feeling reticent about it. "Can I foul a girl? What would happen to me if I did? What if I accidentally touched a boobie?". Leaving the devil's advocate stance, though, while I can understand hesitation I don't think the solution is to try to segregate them but rather to integrate to the level where that unknown awkwardness doesn't exist.
Right Eric, I do realize that he's on her team. But I'm a lot older than you. When I was growing up, I don't think most boys would have wanted a girl on their team, whether or not she was a great player, much less been happy to have her greatness sprinkle onto him. (That is so freaking cute, I want to smooch him.) You don't realize how much progress this is, because you're from a generation that takes a lot more for granted in terms of fairness between boys and girls.
Which is great. I'm glad it seems unsurprising to you that a boy could be proud of his girl teammate. That's progress, too. In fact, this is the reason why I think some younger women sometimes don't get feminism and don't want to identify as feminist: they don't realize that what they see as just the way things are is something someone in my generation or the ones before it fought for. It's frustrating, but I guess in a way it's sort of good, as long as it doesn't result in an erosion of gains.
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